In keeping with the theme of this week’s symposium, I give you. . .

Hell Yeah

The Bloodhound Gang

If I were God there would be no explicit sex on T.V.
Like little Opie eating pie when he made it with Aunt Bea

If I were God thou shall not worship false Billy Idols
And thou shall add the Book Of Flavor Flav to the Bible
Thou shall make fun of Hindus. Thou shall not make a Speed 2
If I were God that’s what I’d do. . .

Heavens no; Hell Yeah. . .

If I were God I’d get a bunch of slaves to do everything
Norwegian lesbians that feed me grapes and know how to sing

If I were God thou shall not wear tube socks with Flip-Flops
Thou shall sit and thou shall spin, thou shall even wife swap
Thou shall resist the Olsen Twins. Thou shall not cut Footloose
If I were God that’s what I’d do. . .

Heavens no; Hell Yeah. . .

And when they nail my pimpled ass to the cross
I’ll tell them I found Jesus that should throw them off
He goes by the name “hey-suess” and steals hubcaps from cars
Oh “hey-suess” can I borrow your crowbar?
To pry these God damn nails out they’re beginning to hurt
Crucified and all I got was this lousy T-shirt.
I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter! I’ll sing as I’m flogged
Yeah that’s what I would do if I were God

So vote for me for Savior and you’ll go to Heaven
Your lame duck Lord is like Kevin Spacey in Seven
With creepy threats of H-E-Double-Hockey-Stick
You just can’t teach an old God new tricks

But would I be a good Messiah with my low self-esteem?
If I don’t believe in myself would that be blasphemy?
Just sport some crummy “holier than thou” facade
Yeah that’s what I would do if I were God

After such a deep, thought-provoking post, it seems only right to even things up a bit by posting something mindless.

So, you may ask what my beef is with Atheists. Let me tell you. A while ago, I started really looking into Atheism, and I got into some discussions with Atheists and so forth. What I found was appalling.

Although all Atheists will claim that their belief in the non-existence of God is based on scientific fact, they cannot point to a single publication in a refereed scientific journal that has proven the non-existence of God.

Worse yet, they believe in other things (such as “the world will be without war once everyone is an Atheist”) that there is ABSOLUTELY NO SCIENTIFIC PROOF of, and yet they believe and defend these things with the rabid passion of the most devout follower of John Birch.

So, you may still ask, what is your problem with Atheists? Don’t Christians and Muslims and Jews believe in things that there is no scientific proof of?

Yes, but Atheists claim a superiority since their belief (oh, excuse me, absence of belief) is based in science and scientific principles. And yet, the things that they believe in most dearly are utterly without scientific backing or proof.

For example, I had one Atheist, who waxed on about how superior science is to primitive “belief”, tell me that he believed that without religion there would be no war. When I pressed him on what sort of scientific proof he had for this theory, he retorted “I believe this to the core of my being! I don’t have proof, but I KNOW that this is true.” He then went on to rant about how stupid and ignorant religious people are.

In other words, they believe in the absolute superiority of science — unless science fails to support their beliefs. This sort of hypocracy among those who claim to be supporters of science is what I dislike about Atheists.

This is a link to a site that claims to display the worst album covers ever.

Worst Album Covers Ever

I don’t know if they are the worst, but they’re pretty damn funny.

Here are a couple of my favorites: